I wanted to take some time to talk about being a Dominant woman yet a respectful one as well. So often men and women feel like if they are involved with a Dominant partner that it means they can be treated in any manner the dominant partner sees fit………I do not like this line of thinking at all
Being Dominant
To be a Dominant Woman you are simply in a position of authority not in the position of holiness and above all social rules and common courtesy. It simply means you can lead you are in charge you are confident and sure of yourself and yes you can even be demanding.
Having respect for everyone
I am without a doubt a Dominant Mistress, I love having control and love my submissive men but I have respect for everyone and everything. I never demand respect I earn it. I do not treat people as if they are objects ( unless that’s what they ask me for) regardless of the nature of our relationship. To be able to submit to a Dominant Woman you have to feel respected and yes even cared for in order for you both to have that bond of trust.
Dominant with manners
That’s right I have manners…so when I am late or cant make something I apologize, when I have hurt someone’s feelings I apologize…I am human and I am not perfect even if I am a Goddess. So don’t be surprised if I show I have manners that I show I am grateful for gifts, and the biggest gift you give me is your respect and submission to me and I treat you well as a result. I do not take my dominant role in your life as a reason to be rude, cunty and down right mean.
Don’t get it twisted
Just because I have respect and have manners and treat everyone submissive or not well…. does not mean I am a push over or any less likely to be strict and push your limits. I will not be treated poorly or rudely and I will not cave to every whim and need you have. I have respect and I have manners I am not however a push over pussy. Never take my kindness for weakness or you will awake the bitch inside of me and well I like to save that for special boy toys hehehehehehe
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Mistresses are people too, right? Lol. No you are most certainly not a push over pussy (I love that term). But you are an honest, straightforward, kind, caring, considerate person, and that is what makes you so awesome, and frankly what makes it a whole lot nicer to call you my Mistress. You are so right you don’t have to be mean or inconsiderate to be a great mistress (like you said unless that is what somebody wants). This was a fascinating post and I enjoyed it immensely. And believe me I never want to awaken your inner bitch!
thank you for your comment and lol never have been a push over pussy pretty sure that’s the vibe I put out there like don’t try to push me around ya pussy hahahah and awww thanks glad you enjoy the way I am 🙂
This is a post that many dominate or wannabe dominate women could learn from. It reminds me of what a celebrity once said about being nice or rude to fans. He said that it takes just as much effort to be rude as it does to be nice, so why not be nice?
why thanks fs and I so agree with that quote….and I am also secure enough in my role that I don’t need to be mean or cunty to prove I am a dominant woman 🙂
Good morning mistress. We have done many calls together over the past few years. You have always respected me. You make me feel like I’ve said many times before like I’m the only person in the world. When we’re together I really feel like we’re together, like we’ve been friends forever. Thank you for making me feel special. I will love you forever for that.
HI there sweetie and thank you for this wonderful comment……..it does feel like we have known each other forever and that’s a beautiful thing. I enjoy our special time together and I am thrilled I make you feel so amazing because you make me feel pretty fucking awesome!!!
Dear Mistress Your comments are so amazingly true and reflect on what a Dominant Goddess you are. A sissy that steps out of line deserves to be put in her place. Actually, its the same from guys, some guys treat their sissy badly and they aren’t actually dominant.
being put in your place is one thing but being treated poorly just because someone calls themselves a dominant person just does not fly with me 🙂
I really appreciate this post, Ms. Constance! There are all kinds of misguided assumptions and tropes regarding what a dominant woman “should” be like. I’m tired of caricatures that paint Mistresses as one-dimensional, disrespectful screamers. I think that respect, authority, and dominance are earned through being a strong woman who understands and acknowledges her submissives’ boundaries. Now, as a strict Mistress, I certainly love delivering a soul-crushing verbal tongue lashing, but even then…there’s an underlying respect between myself and my caller.
Ms Marlena you hit the nail on the head we are not screamers and one dimensional at all!! Strict or sensual mild or mean there is always a certain level of respect between the dominant woman and her submissive partner. thank you so much for dropping this comment and for sharing your thoughts 🙂
Mistress Constance,
The saying “With great power comes great responsibility” applies to your line of work.
steph I could not agree more 🙂
Ms. Constance, my hat is off to you for this post! It always disturbs me when a man who is new to exploring his submissive side or has had experiences with a woman who “dominated” him with some arbitrary wielding of her “power” or force at the expense of his experience seems to have fallen prey to the idea that, as a submissive, how he thinks and feels does not -and should not- matter. It DOES matter – and unless there is a two-way street of respect, understanding, and positive regard, the experience is doomed to be a negative one.
Just as indicating what he wants -and does not want- in a D/s experience is not topping from the bottom or undermining his submissive desires, our displaying manners, caring, respect, concern, and humanity in the same D/s experience does not make us weak or any less Dominant. Thank you for reinforcing that fact, Constance. 🙂
Why thank you so much Ms EJ I could not agree more and I always feel so good when a submissive man is shown the true was a dominant woman can be in a mutual respectful relationship thank you for being someone who totally gets it I so love your style!!
Great blog post, Ms. Constance! I could not agree more. I always say that I am human first and Mistress second. I also don’t believe that being a Mistress and being disrespectful of anyone are synonymous. Mutual respect is what is really hot! Just because someone submits in no way means they are a doormat!
Why thank you so much I agree human first mistress second and yes mutual respect is so very hot thanks for the comment sexy lady
Perfectly said, Ms Constance! There is no need to be overly aggressive with hateful and disrespecting words or actions. We get into these D/s roles together and willingly. So there should be a nice little discussion first , on how things will go in that relationship. I do not do the screaming and yelling as there’s no need. I can get my point across perfectly fine without, as I KNOW you do as well. Respect for both parties involved , for sure! Loved this!!
why thank you sexy Kaylee amen to together and willingly so there has to be respect between both and yes you know just how to get your point across in a very sexy way too!
You know, I can be cunty (love that term) for a very short call, and only if I’m asked, but I don’t really enjoy it. Everyone says I’m so nice, and I’ve been accused of being “too nice,” but in my opinion, a real dominant comes from a place of kindness. Now, we as mistresses understand that kindness to a kinky person is not asking them to change to fit a certain ideal, it’s meeting them where they are. So if your little heart would love nothing more than for me to call you a sissy faggot cocksucking whore, then that’s what you’ll get. But it’s only because I care. You know? 😉
LOL I think we all have a cunty side Ms Piper hehehehe and yes they ask for it they get it but it is not our go to way of being and of course you only do it because you care because you rock like that hehehehe
Women just like men are due respect, dominant women included. I’ve always felt respected by you and as they say “To earn respect, one must give respect”. You’ve always earned my respect by the way you not only treat me, but by the way I see you treat others. As a submissive man, how can one not respect independent, hard working women who also know just how to control men with such ability as yourself.
yes you are correct wes 100% and thank you for the wonderful compliment and as my submissive man you know I care deeply about you and everything we do is done with care and thought in it 🙂
I LOVE this blog post Ms Constance! Sometimes people think that a Mistress should be “mistress-y” in an email but basically that’s just doing a session for free. I’ve had those guys try to “bait” me into being bitchy and I tell them that Mistress doesn’t mean bitch — unless it’s in scene. IN SCENE anything goes oh yeah, it sure does …. but out of scene, I’m with you — I like respectful! Sort of like FS’s comment …. it really does take the same amount of time so why not be polite!?
Ohh Ms Olivia baiting is the worst! grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr and I agree we don’t go around being bitchy it is reserved for our time on the phone for those who ask for it and crave it
Oh and can I just say I cracked up at Stephanie’s Stan Lee quote!
LOL, I’m glad I was able to humor you Mistress Olivia. It’s kindof ironic with sissies being the ones in tights…lol
hehehe yes!